St. Patricks day is a religious holiday celebrated internationally on 17 March. It commemorates Saint Patrick, the day is generally spent going to church, wearing green and most importantly DRINKING ALCOHOL!
This year myself (Punky) and my lovely Starfish decided the only way to spend St. Paddys would be by playing a friendly round of golf, and by golf I mean Pub Golf. Pub golf is a very very competitive game that requires intense stamina and concentration to be able to come out victorious - at the end of the day no one likes being a loser.
We had our course set out and obviously we needed a time limit in which to complete our round of golf.
Our course was carefully planned out and no more than a hour was to be spent at each hole (Pub) where at least ONE drink had to be consumed and a new drink had to be consumed every time for example Punkys drink of choice a Hunters Dry could only be ordered ONCE, and a photo indicating what hole we were on had to be taken.
Our 9 hole course consisted of the following places:
Hole 1: Home - No one likes to tee off without a bit of pre drinkage do they?
Hole 2: The Baron Main - We were rather wary of this hole as none of the starfish had been thrown into the depths of this watering hole. Apon arrival it was abundantly clear that this was a watering hole of the over 30's and our green attire and painted faces were not well received. This was a shot destination. Be hit them back and moved onto Hole 3. 15mins in and out. This is my kinda drinking.
Hole 3: Hooters - GREEN BEER! Now being girls we are NOT fans of Beer (I am still to understand how guys enjoy drinking what I assumed wet dirty socks would taste like) We ordered our Green Beer and knocked it back in true hero fashion. I am starting to have mild beer goggles.
Hole 4: O'Hagans - Our FIRST Irish pub. There are masses of drunk men (who are all looking rather attractive due to beer goggles) standing around singing Irish songs and using pick up lines such as "Kiss my I'm Irish" and "Do you wanna rub Pot of gold". Stay focused Punky, we are on a mission here.
Hole 5: Buddahta - A more classy establish meant situated in the Design Quarter. Apparently they didn't get the memo that it is St. Paddys day. There are 5 people in the whole place. We order our drinks and QUICKLY move on. 15mins another quickie I like this. EPIC Moment upon departure, we get escorted to our cars on a Golf Cart, I think this classifies as a Hole in One?
Hole 6: Molly Malones - That awkward situation when your over the limit and you bump into your Varsity Statistics lecturer.... That just happened. Must head to bar immediately. Wait at the bar for literally 45mins to get a drink, I am loosing my personality fast... Oh Wait, What.....Free drinks! Result! Personality has come back.
Hole 7: Keg and Maiden - Shots! Shots! Shots! Punky and Starfish's wobble out of the establishment. I think people are staring.
Hole 8: Stones - More Shots! Shots! Shots! PS. I haven't mentioned it yet, but you will soon find out that the quickest way into my heart is through Caramel Vodka and keep them shots coming! My heart is warm. Sigh I could drink Caramel Vodka hourly for the rest of my life and live happily.
Hole 9: Billy the B.U.M.S - We have blown our WHOLE budget. Crisis Mode - Boobs Out. Don't judge us boys you know you all love a bit of boobage. I think its a win win situation for all! Wait what is that, 100 ronds in our "secret back-up compartment" sober stars fish is such a clever cookie, hiding money from her drunk starfish self to get surprises during the night. DRINKS! DRINKS! DRINKS!
Tiger Woods - I think we just stole the Ryder Cup from you. BAM!
Mission. Completed.
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